Me: You've lived in this house as long as I have. Adam: No, I haven't.

Adam: Are you happy? Me: NO! Adam: Trick question, you're never happy.

Adam downloaded the nice/naughty scanner on the kindle. It said "nice" for about 20 times that he tried it. The first time I did, it said "naughty" so he made me try it again, and then it said "nice". He said, "it had to check waaaaaaaaaay back in your past."

Adam: Well, it's time for spaghetti, 4:56.

Adam: What happened to your voice? Me: ------- Adam: No, it's not. Me: ------- Adam: <giggle>"

Adam: More people in Lewisburg don't believe in Santa than do believe. I'm surprised he comes to Lewisburg at all. I guess he just goes to the houses that believe.

Adam: Everything sounds funny in a language you don't understand.

Adam: If I'm imagining tiny kittens playing football, it's just so cute. Imagine it.

Adam: The Titans are done for.

Me: I'm not going to Walmart. Adam: I KNOW! Black Friday is still going on.

Adam: You're watching church on tv? See, you don't have to go to church to go to church. Me: Yeah, but sometimes it's good to be with other people. Adam: You are with other people. Teddy is watching.

Adam: Ewww, I licked his fur. Am I weird? I wanted to see what Dizzy tastes when she massages Teddy.

Adam: I can't do everything at once. Me: Why not? Adam: I'm not you.

Adam: This is the first time you made breakfast casserole that it's actually good. Me: It's always good. Adam: You made this before? Me: Yes. Adam: Well, this is the first time you got it right.

Adam: Rosie, just because you are deaf and blind doesn't mean you have the right to lick my shorts.

Me: I've about had it with you and your big mouth. Adam: My mouth is not big, it's normal-sized.

Adam: We finally get to meet a German!

Me: How did you get poop on the floor? Adam: Oh, I don't know. I really don't have an answer for that.

Me: God, something stinks! Adam: Don't talk about me.

Me: Something stinks and it's you. Adam: Yup, it's me.

Me: Why would you you say something like that? Adam : Cause I'm just that crazy.

Adam: Mom? Me: What? Adam: Is that you? Me: No. Adam: Then why did you answer?

Adam is worried that I haven't updated my blog since August. So now it is updated.

Me: Be quiet. Adam: I see you're extra mean today.

Me: ADAM! Adam: WHAT? Me: What are you doing? Adam: Picking my nose.

Adam: I want to get on your computer. Me: Ok, just be careful. Adam: HUH? What's going to happen? Me: I dunno, I'm delirious.

Me: See if you can keep your shirt clean until after you get your pict... what is that all over your shirt?! Adam: Boogers

Adam: Mom, I don't want to talk about that anymore.

Adam: Rosie is having a seizure and bouncing like a gorilla.

Adam: If the tooth fairy doesn't come, can you just give me a dollar? Me: YES!

Adam: Can you get me the new Skylanders game? How much money do you have? Try not to buy as much food.

Me: I'm the bomb diggety. Adam: If you keep saying that, I am NOT going to high-five you.

<phone rings> Ainsley: Let me talk to Adam. Adam: Whaaaaat? I don't want to talk to youuuuuu.

Adam: This towel is kinda small, don't look, ok?

Adam: Did you know that Santa, the tooth fairy, the sandman and the Easter bunny all know each other?

Adam: Does Canada have a language? Me: They speak English or French. Adam: And sometimes they say "eh".

Adam: Well, dogs can't vote.

Adam: Mom? You used to look pretty good.

Adam: Please don't hurt me, I'm too scared.

Adam: You know those sweet potato fries? Me: Do they have them at school? Adam: Yeah, they're kinda gross, they might be better with marshmallows.

Adam: They don't need all those lights. They have headlights, unless they are going by horse and wagon.

Adam: I don't really like vegetables, but I like broccoli, carrots and tomatoes.

Power went out briefly. Adam: MOM!!!... oh I just went blind for 5 seconds.

Adam: Wouldn't it be nice if headlights lasted forever? Me: It would be nice if lots of things lasted forever. Adam: Like life? .... if it weren't for Adam and Eve... not this Adam, the other Adam, the first one.

Adam: I think people who are autistic like me don't have normal heads.

Suspension

Today was one of those sucky autism days. No matter what was expected of Adam, he was not going to cooperate. He refused to do his work, screamed and yelled, and then ran away from his teacher when they went outside. As a result, he earned himself a 2 day suspension from school. Contrary to what he may believe, this is not a vacation. He will have work to do. Sigh...

Adam: Mom, could you be a little less noisy about it? I think the whole neighborhood can hear you.

Breakthroughs

Wonderboy has an aversion to homework and shoes. Today he rocked both.

Adam: What I mean by "a lot" is "A LOT!

Adam: That's an unfortunate name for a valley... Death Valley? I thought valleys were supposed to be peaceful.

Me: You should ask Mackenzie to go with you to the dj party at the end of the month. Adam: Will you buy me a little tuxedo?

Adam: I'm going to run into a lemon tree. Ainsley: Why? Adam: If life gives you lemons, make lemonade!

Ainsley: When you graduate, you get to live in the real world. Adam: What? I live in the real world now.

Adam: If you ever die, and you can't remember how you died, ask me and I'll tell you.

Ainsley: There's an ambulance at McDonald's. Adam: It's either a health attack, or someone is pregnant, or someone is internally bleeding.

Adam: YOU ALMOST SET THE HOUSE ON FIRE! Me: No, I didn't, it just boiled over a little. Adam: Well, you almost boiled the house to death.

Adam: Sometimes it's good when water comes out of your nose.... you're gonna put this on that book thing, aren't you?

Me: We're not pigs, it's about time we started living like we're not. Adam: We all have our own personalities.

Adam: You turn blue, then you die.

Adam: I don't like what you're making for supper. I'm making something else. Me: This isn't a restaurant. Adam: Duh, you don't make your own food in a restaurant.

Adam: Hey, Mom? Me: What? Adam: I'm happy.

Adam turned 9 today! Happy Birthday!

A much better day

today than yesterday. I am now teaching him how to do his own laundry.

This week is TCAP testing at all TN schools. Adam is taken to a separate room with his teacher and one assistant for the test. He did well while completing the test yesterday, until the students returned to the room he was in, and proceeded to have a party and he was told to leave the room. OF COURSE he had a meltdown!

Adam loves to play Skylanders. Yesterday he told me that I looked like this one, "except for the skinny part".

Today was hell. That is all.

Photo shoot

We just returned from a photo session. I'm so glad the photographer was cool and I didn't have to explain to him that Adam has autism and was doing the best he could. I've got some great photos headed my way!

Catching up

Seems I've been pretty negligent on keeping up here, so here is what's been happening.

Adam has been mostly doing well in school, with fewer and less severe meltdowns than previously. Not that he doesn't still have some doozies, but I feel like his school placement has been pretty successful for the past couple of years. He is so incredibly smart and imaginative, the conversations we have leave me either scratching my head or laughing my head off. As is typical with boys his age and/or kids with autism, he finds things to be obsessed with. He seems to be moving away from Transformers and into Skylanders, a game that is played on our wii system. That's partly my fault, as I've always been fond of Spyro, the little purple dragon, and enjoy playing it myself, so I've been buying the characters and printed out the walkthrough (cheats) for him. We have been home this week on spring break, and have spent most of it just hanging out and relaxing. He's not too fond of the bugs outside, and the pollen has made me feel terrible, so we haven't ventured out much. He did take a trip from our home in TN to MI with Mack, the man I am dating, who is a truck driver. I think he enjoyed it, but he was anxious to get back home to his game.