Adam: What's that smell? Me: You. Adam: No, I mean it smells good. 

Adam: You're going to have to re-potty train me. I stand up to pee. 

Adam: What's for supper? Me: Lasagna. Adam: I hope Garfield doesn't show up. 

Adam, after waking up from a 2 hour nap : I was NOT asleep! 

Adam: Why were those guys looking for chili in that mine? 

Adam: Can I buy a convertible when I get older? Me: Yeah, will you let me drive it? Adam: Sure, if you're not dead by then. 

Adam: I'm almost dressed, I just don't have any pants on. 

Adam (holding packet of taco seasoning mix) : "How do you make tacos out of THIS? 

"I pledge all agents, to the flag, of the United States of America..." ~Adam 

Me: I'm gonna sell you to the gypsies. Adam: I need to bring my toys.... and diapers. Me: Diapers?! Adam: Yeah, in case someone has a baby... or do gypsies lay eggs?

Adam: If you're still alive when I'm 29, I'll come visit you. 

Adam: Is my plumber cracking? 

Me: I know all about kids making up stuff. Adam: Except for me, sometimes I tell the truth.

Adam: It's a good thing my nose is stopped up. Me: Why? Adam: I farted. 

Adam: I don't have dreams... I have nightmares. 

Adam: When I'm 22, will I have to shop for you? I can buy you meat products. 

Me: Adam, are you being a pain? Adam: No, I'm being a veterinarian!.... Of course I'm being a pain! 

Adam: When were computers invented? Me: I'm not sure, why? Adam: Whenever they did it, they did a pretty good job.

Adam: "I might be a teenager by 2019." <blink, blink>

Adam: What's a bartender? Me: Someone who pours drinks. Adam: Can I have a drink? Am I a bartender? 

Talking to Joe the Plumber about Buzz Lightyear

Me: I'm so DONE with you! Adam: And the day has just started.