Fall break

We are out of school this week on fall break and have done nothing but be lazy. My goal for the week was to get Adam's room cleaned up, but here it is Thursday already and it's not happened. Oh, well.

I have learned how to blog from my cell phone. I'm awesome like that.

Trying to catch up

I'm a really bad blogger. Now that our lives have settled down a bit and the worst seems to be behind us, I'm going to try to do better. We made it through Bobby's illness and death, and are looking toward the future. I have started seeing a great guy who is having a positive impact on all of us. It can only get better!

Adam: When Grandma's trees start hatching pears, can we have some?

Adam: Footloose? It sounds like their shoes are untied.

Me: You're the biggest pain in the butt there is! Adam: Well.... in the United States...

Adam: Once I invent a time machine, I'll show ya!

Adam: Wow, this is award-winning fog!

Adam: What if we had a voodoo doll of Mom? Imagine what we could do then! Me: How do you know about voodoo dolls? Adam: Well, I do watch a lot of TV...

Adam: I don't have the diarrhea anymore, I just have the pee-arrhea.

Adam: Why are you out here? Me: To enjoy the quiet. Adam: You've come to the wrong place.

Adam: I can't help but notice that Aunt Ruby found her false teeth.

Me: I was so proud of you today. You did a great job! Adam: I don't think you should be all that proud.

Adam, to teacher at funeral home: Well, this is awkward.

Adam: I'm not civilized.

Adam: Are you going grocery shopping today? Me: I don't know. Adam: I can help you with that decision.

Adam: Rosie isn't skunky stinky now, she's just regular stinky, can she come in?

Adam: Did you eat that cookie? Me: No. Adam: That's what happens in court. Suspects always say no.

Having a hard time with the boy lately

I don't know if it's because of his dad being in the hospital on life support, or autism related issues, or just Adam being Adam, but the past couple of weeks have been horrible. I just can't get a break from him and he won't even go to sleep at night anymore. I need a nap.

Adam: I don't know why I cried. It was like I was in a movie for a few minutes.

Me: I want you to clean up your room, please. Adam: What's in it for me?

I told Adam to tell you thanks for dinner and he asked if you paid and I said yes, I have the card and he said "smart plan, twisted, but smart" (Ainsley)

Adam: It's never too late for grape juice!

Adam: I definitely know you do not like Transformers.

Adam: Whatever you do, take me where you go, unless I can't go with you.

Adam: Your privacy is not my privacy. Me: Really? Adam: Yeah. Me: What does that even mean? Adam: I don't know, you'll know in a few minutes.

Adam: I like disturbing you!

Adam: Maybe on Saturday I'll leave you alone the rest of the day... maybe.... not sure...

Adam: I got monkey fever!

Ainsley: The wasp isn't going to get you and if it did, you're not going to die. Adam: Yeah, but I'd cry uncontrollably.

Adam: Are we...? Me: Don't ask me again. Adam: Can we still go to McDonald's?

Adam: What's for supper? Me: Cicada stew. Adam: I think I'll have McDonald's.

Adam: Can we have McDonald's for supper? Me: Quit asking me that. Adam: Well, will you answer with a "yes"?

Adam: If Grandma's home today, we could ask her to give us some lunch.

Adam: what is this, hippie music?

Me: Stop squeaking. Adam: It's not squeaking, it's a farting sound.

Me: Turn off the tv and go to bed. Adam: Can't you say something nicer?

Adam: Do you know what I'm famous for? Me: Being a pain in the butt. Adam: I'm the best pain in the butt there is!

A little bribery goes a long way

I am sitting here in a psychiatric office waiting room, while Adam is in the next room undergoing an evaluation. I heard the beginning of a meltdown, and it wasn't long before the evaluator came out and said he was DONE. I went back and told him that if he would get through this (long and boring) test, we would go out to eat and then to Walmart. A girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do!

Me: Stop doing that. It makes me want to strangle you. Adam: Enough with the trash talk already.

Me: I'm just getting here. Adam: What are you, a turtle?

Adam: Do you know how to tell a boy horse from a girl horse? The boy horse has shorter hair.

Adam: What's Dodger's whole name? Me: I don't know, the Artful Dodger? Adam: He doesn't paint!

Adam: I'm secretly saying 'ow'. I guess it's not a secret anymore.

Adam: I'm weird, ain't I?

Adam: I think I finally reached puberty.

Adam: Do they have cameras all over the place, even on the interstates? Me: Yup. Adam: I think we're being watched.

Adam: If we live on an old country road, why don't we talk like old country people?

Adam: That's the longest one I ever pooped out.

Inspired!

Just an old globe and a desk lamp and we have a lesson on the earth's rotation. His idea, by the way. It was even fun when he imagined burning up people when he moved the earth right up to the sun, lol. 

Me: You're a bunch of pigs. Adam: No, I'm only one pig.

Adam: It must be hard being a mime.

Adam: Look at that dog! Look at that dog! Look at that dog! Look at that dog! You shoulda seen that dog.

Ever the optimist

Adam prefers the option of putting as little effort as possible into anything he does to achieve the desired result. I suppose it's a combination of genetics (he gets it from his dad), autism, and just being a seven year old boy.


Our goal for him in school is to be in a regular classroom setting as much as possible. He started by spending most of his day in a special education room and we've gradually worked into more time in the regular room as his behavior indicates. Recently, he has decided he wants to be in the regular room a lot more. His teachers and I all agreed that this is a good thing, even after discovering the real motive behind it... he has realized that he is required to do more work in the special ed. room.

Inspire me

I'm not the kind of writer who can just whip out a paragraph or two because I think I should say something... I need inspiration. And today, I'm too tired to be inspired.

Sometimes all you need is a Spongebob umbrella

Homework wars

It would be too much to expect a good day at school, AND come home and do homework without a meltdown, wouldn't it? Scribbling through the worksheet does not get you out of doing it, either. It looks like I've got a long evening ahead of me.

Great resources!

One of the best things about autism in today's world is the unlimited number of resources now available for parents or caregivers. I received this article in my email this morning.

http://www.autismsupportnetwork.com/news/why-people-autism-aspergers-seem-so-awkward-around-others-33892322

Too cold for shorts!

It is currently 35 degrees outside. Adam thinks he should wear shorts to school. Uh, I don't think so.

Transformers

Adam's obsession is Transformers. He was happy to find a Transformers PS2 game at a pawn shop a couple of weeks ago. I bought it for him yesterday and he's been in Optimus Prime heaven.

His sister, Ainsley, is home on a visit from college. We're all piled up here on the bed. Silliness abounds.

Adam: I sound like a monkey. Me: You smell like one, too. Adam: That's my feet.

Adam: I can turn any conversation into a different one.

Adam: why would you want a mobile home if it doesn't have a steering wheel?

Adam: Don't worry, Goldie cleaned it up.

Adam: I got through with the spoons, so I threw them away. Grandma: You threw them away? Adam: No, I put them in the sink, I get confused. Grandma: We usually just wash them.

Adam: I accidentally threw your phone in the garbage... you might want to clean it off.

Me: That's what happens when you act stupid. Adam: I'm not acting.

Adam: I'm not a brat, I have autism. Me: You are a brat AND you have autism.

Adam: Let me check if my pants are done leaking.

Adam: Ainsley, does this guy look cool? Does he look cool? Hey, is this Transformer cool? Hey! Hey! I'm TALKING to you!!! Ainsley: What?! Adam: Does this guy look cool?

Adam: It was Ainsley's idea to get him (Dodger), so we should ban her from the family. But not Dodger.

Adam: Are you happy? Me: I'm deliriously happy. Adam: Why, 'cause Dad's gone?

Adam: Dad's gone. Me: Then close the front door. Adam: Why, so he can't get back in?

Adam: Whatever you tell me to do, I do the opposite.

Adam: I feel so powered up that I can stay up all night.

Adam: This is the best year ever! Even though it's just started, it's still the best year!

Adam: Remember when we stayed up til midnight and cheered for the new year? Me: Yes, I remember, it was only a few hours ago. Adam: Well, it was yesterday. No, technically it was today, the very first thing.